Posts tagged personal growth

10 Top Personal Development Bloggers Share Their Advice –
Part Three

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We have arrived at the third and final part of our interview series with some of the top personal development bloggers out there.

Read Part One Here | Read Part Two Here

In this post, we finally see some differences of opinion, especially in the final question, “Can anyone ever really reach self-actualization?” I personally have my own opinion on this, but I didn’t want that to influence what was published in this post. I think it’s important to see all different perspectives because all of them can be valuable in one way or another. Different things are inspiring to different people, and the goal of UpGusto is to help you and every other person move forward, closer to where you want to be in life.

And now, without further ado, let’s finish up what we started.

8. What’s one thing you’ve improved about yourself that you’re proud of and has made your life better, and how did you accomplish this?

“Giving myself a break – and not thinking that I have to be perfect at everything I do. How did I accomplish this? I did this by learning to let go of my past.”
- Alex Blackwell, thebridgemaker.com

“One of the greatest things I’ve done is develop a ‘just do it’ mindset. I love this motto and it’s something I say often to myself. Whenever I’m faced with a fear or I am discouraged or I notice I’m procrastinating, I tell myself the ‘just do it’ motto and make it happen. This has helped me push past many barriers and continue to grow.”
- Brendan Baker, startofhappiness.com

“Letting others be involved in my life as well. I had always felt that I needed to do everything myself, be it in my personal life or in business. Allowing others to be a part of my life meant that I didn’t need to put the weight of everything on my shoulders anymore. Now in my personal life, I have my fiance who is with me all the time, supporting and helping me. In my business, I have my admin team and team of contractors whom I outsource stuff to regularly to offload my work. I know that no matter what I’m facing, I always have people who will be there for me to help me out, vs. in the past when I kept thinking that I have to face and do everything alone.”
- Celestine Chua, personalexcellence.co

“I learned the true relationship between money and happiness, and stopped wasting money on things that didn’t contribute to my long-term happiness. I opted out of the normal Western habit of constantly paying for entertainment and gratification, and suddenly I was able to live on half what I lived on before, and I became immediately happier and healthier. It’s like doubling your income instantly. I saved up money very quickly and within a year was able to quit my job to do what I love, which I consider my greatest accomplishment. I learned how to do this from Mr Money Mustache’s blog (mrmoneymustache.com) and I will be forever grateful for what I learned from it. Taking control of my finances like this changed everything almost overnight, not just for my finances but for my sense of control and stability, and future possibilities.”
- David Cain, raptitude.com

“One thing? I’d have to say the willingness to keep facing the discomfort within me, and keep feeling my feelings fully, whatever they are. I’ve done this through meditation. When I say meditation, I mean sitting or lying down and feeling whatever feelings that are present. I let go of the story around the feelings, and I feel the feelings. I let them take over. I welcome them. When I do this, they tend to dissipate and dissolve.”
- Henri Junttila, wakeupcloud.com

“I’ve taken risks throughout my life and I’ve failed at about 50% of them. That process has given me courage to risk failing because I’ve been able to bounce back. No failure has set me back permanently. I’ve learned that when I feel like everything is too hard and I’ll never reach my goals, I can go to bed and give it another try in the morning. The fact that I get up every day and try again is what I’m most proud of. We need to give ourselves credit for diligence and perseverance instead of focusing solely on success. Success doesn’t come every time, but diligence and perseverance feel good every time — doing our best work with commitment is what matters. That’s what gets me up every day to give it another try.”
- Penelope Trunk, penelopetrunk.com

“I was hopelessly self-conscious when I was younger. I felt I could read other people’s minds and knew exactly what they were thinking about me and about other things. I was extremely sensitive and in tune with people, but couldn’t quite relate to them for some reason. At age 20 I changed everything. I dropped my friends ‘drinking buddies’, changed my job and even changed the city I lived in. And recognising what I needed to change and that I needed to be around other people like me led me to take up ‘nursing’ as a career. I didn’t become a nurse but everything has led me to helping others: doing a psychology degree, becoming a homeless worker, becoming an addiction worker and then becoming a personal development writer and blogger, and now it has all culminated in me writing to you, the person who is hoping to make a difference in other people’s lives by blogging on personal development, it all works out in the end”
- Steve Aitchison, stevenaitchison.co.uk

“I’m exponentially less likely to get wound up by criticism or fly off the handle than I was 10 years ago. One word, meditation.”
- Tim Brownson, adaringadventure.com

“There are many goals I have achieved over the years with which I am pleased and yes, even proud of accomplishing. Most recently, giving up the day job, having replaced my income with my online business income was a big goal that gave me a lot of pleasure. But, in terms of how I have personally improved, I would say that it is the ability to consistently set and achieve such goals that is the biggest change in myself for which I am most proud.”
- Will Edwards, whitedovebooks.co.uk

9. What do you feel is the most important aspect that people should improve about their lives?

“I think the best thing we can do is to let go of past mistakes and forgive. When we hold on to mistakes or to anger, it keeps us stuck in the past and unable to live in the present. But when we forgive and let go, we are free to live in the present and embrace the life that is waiting.”
- Alex Blackwell, thebridgemaker.com

“Your mindset is fundamental to everything you do. When you can learn to control your mind you can learn to control your life. I was actually watching a Tony Robbins video just yesterday and he mentioned the number one key to success in any area of your life is taking control of your state. It’s the same thing. When you can control your thoughts, your emotions and your responses to everything around you, that’s when you control your life.”
- Brendan Baker, startofhappiness.com

“Find their inner selves and be true to that. Many people today are doing things for other people and trying to live up to others’ projections of them. But who is the real them? What is it they truly want? Many people can’t answer such a question, or only provide mild replies to the questions. At Personal Excellence, I’m constantly writing about the journey of self-discovery from all angles, be it discovering our goals, beauty, self-respect, self-worth, and so on. Self-discovery is a life-long journey and it never ends.”
- Celestine Chua, personalexcellence.co

“Their moment-to-moment state of consciousness. Everything hinges on it. The quality of your consciousness determines your quality of life. You do everything better when you can keep your attention more or less on what’s happening in your immediate surroundings. Generally, we are way too preoccupied with images of how things might go later. Staying present is a skill everyone should work on. There are piles of literature on how to do that.”
- David Cain, raptitude.com

“I don’t know if it’s something to improve. Instead, I’d say it’s something to notice. What has helped me the most is meditation. By diving deep into yourself, you see where everything comes from. For a long time, I chased money, because I thought it would bring happiness. I still do from time to time, but the stranglehold of money is gone. I discovered that wanting money was a consequence of wanting security, which was a result of thinking that I’d end up on the street all alone. But who knows what would happen if I didn’t have money? What if it was a blessing in disguise? You see, your thinking tricks you into different actions. It’s not until you see this that you’re truly free, and that you can truly follow your bliss and inspiration.”
- Henri Junttila, wakeupcloud.com

“By far the most important is knowing that you can change your beliefs about anything. Beliefs are the bedrock of your life at this very moment. Everything you do, say, think and feel is based on your beliefs about yourself and the world around you. Change your beliefs and you literally change your reality. We all live in the same world, but live in our own reality, changing your beliefs changes your reality.”
- Steve Aitchison, stevenaitchison.co.uk

“That is too individual to give a general answer too. Everyone is different, so everyone has different aspects they would need to improve about themselves.”
- Tim Brownson, adaringadventure.com

“Kindness! I think that society as a whole, certainly where I live in the UK, has become far less tolerant. When I was a kid, we were taught to play games to win, but to be magnanimous in victory and, in defeat, to not be disappointed provided we had tried our best. Trying your best is really all you can do. If you could have done better, then you may have cause for regret, otherwise, you should appreciate that you met a better opponent or team and applaud them for it. I believe that attitude prepares us well for our place in society. These days, many young kids are exposed to the win-at-all-costs mentality that can lead to disrespect for opponents and that attitude, carried on into life, can lead to less caring, tolerance and kindness. But we all have the power to change the world around us; to become beacons, pointing the way for others and many people do take up this challenge. I love to see people being kind to complete strangers for no reason other than to help a fellow human being and that’s what the world needs – more of that attitude.”
- Will Edwards, whitedovebooks.co.uk

10. Do you believe that anyone can ever reach self-actualization (where there is no more room for improvement)?

“I don’t think so. I think we find more happiness and less anxiety when we use more -ing words and fewer -ed words. For example, I’m learning; I’m growing; and I’m living empowers us to remember that life is indeed a process – and a wonderful journey.”
- Alex Blackwell, thebridgemaker.com

“Great question, however I would say no. I can’t think of any human on this planet that could not benefit from improvement. Even someone like the Dalai Lama continues to improve himself, learning about new cultures, new technologies, etc. The world is constantly evolving and every single person is unique and has a different perspective. Therefore there is always something new to learn. I think if you were to reach a stage of ‘knowing it all’, that’s when you will fail.”
- Brendan Baker, startofhappiness.com

“Sure, definitely! I believe the highest stage of our growth is enlightenment. I don’t think there is necessarily no more room for improvement at that point because human minds are so dynamic and vast, but that would be the highest end state of self-growth. I believe everyone has the propensity to reach there: maybe not within a lifetime, but all of us are heading there no doubt! David Hawkins wrote a book (Power vs. Force) about the 17 different levels of consciousness which I’ve covered in my article on Map of Consciousness. I highly recommend everyone to read that actually; I personally found it fascinating, sort of like a map-out of the tiers of growth we move through. The highest level at the end is what I mentioned about enlightenment, while the 16 levels before are what we work through in life before getting there.”
- Celestine Chua, personalexcellence.co

“No. There is an enormous movement of people who think that that perfect enlightenment is achievable and is a worthy pursuit. I think this pursuit amounts to a refusal to accept that life will always contain some degree of suffering and lack of control. We can certainly improve our quality of life greatly as we get better at it, but I think it’s senseless to expect any sort of finish line. It is very liberating to give up on getting there and just being wherever you are.”
- David Cain, raptitude.com

“I don’t remember who said it, but I remember the phrase, “We are in a constant state of being and becoming.” We are already perfect, whole, and happy, but we are also on this planet to experience and grow. The key is to stop rushing anywhere. There’s no rush. There’s no improving upon yourself. The paradox is that once you stop trying, things happen faster. This life is a stage, a game, a time to have fun and enjoy life. There’s no need to take this so seriously. There’s no need to take your thoughts so seriously. I still have to remind myself of this, but I’m becoming better at living life in a more relaxed, fun way.”
- Henri Junttila, wakeupcloud.com

“Honestly! No. We are always in a state of flux, a constant state of change therefore by definition we cannot reach self-actualization, but we can get to the stage of realizing that self-actualization should not actually be a goal, but a journey we strive for every day.”
- Steve Aitchison, stevenaitchison.co.uk

“I’m honestly not sure. I think it may be possible for some people, the Dalai Lama springs to mind. Although my guess is if you asked him that question he’d probably say he still has room for improvement. So there you have it, I changed my mind within one sentence and I guess there is always room to improve.”
- Tim Brownson, adaringadventure.com

“As I understand self-actualisation, it is not a state of nirvana in which no further improvement can be made; it is the state of mind we reach when we are living our life purpose. Maslow defined 5 groups of human needs: physiological, safety, social, esteem and self-actualisation. The big question is: where is your mind? When you can say that most of your thinking revolves around your life work, then I would say you are self-actualised. However, I would also say that there is always room for improvement.”
- Will Edwards, whitedovebooks.co.uk

How about you?

What improvement about yourself are you most proud of, and how did you accomplish it?

Can anyone truly reach their full potential? Or is there always room for improvement?

Weigh in with your thoughts in a comment. I’d love to know what you think!

Next week I’m going to give my input on all 10 questions, so sign up below to be notified when that’s published.

Recommended Reading and Radical Resources:

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